Sooooo….can we talk curse words for a minute?
I have been cussing on my blog since I very first started blogging back in 2009. As M+BL grew, I started getting emails like this:
“You are so awesome, I love you so much, but why do you have to cuss, can you please stop?”
To which I would reply: “I never curse at a person or use my words to hurt anyone, I only curse to be funny. I curse to myself when I stub my toe, or curse at my blender when it stops working and I am trying to make something for my kid.”
According to Catholicism, it’s a sin to curse AT a person and to use words in a hurtful way, but it is not a sin to curse and use the words in communication to simply communicate or tell a story.
Thing is, a lot of Protesants (a large grouping of Christians, ie: Anglicans, Baptists, Lutherans, Methodists, and Presbyterians) believe that any type of cursing is a sin, whether you are using the words to be funny or to actually hurt someone. I just found this out, since I am Catholic (albeit I am not devout and tend to be a little bit too liberal to fit in well).
Once I found that out, I realized why people were getting so upset about it! I just couldn’t understand what the big deal was before!
The other week I got a comment on the M+BL Facebook page that was not very nice. She told me she was not going to buy my cookbook because I curse on the blog. And that I “looked so nice in my pictures, but that nice looks don’t make up for a dirty mouth.” Then a couple of other people commented on it saying things like “Yeah! I agree!”. And one even said she reported me to the LDS church. I guess there is an LDS magazine that recommended my cookbook or something.
In typical fashion, I responded: “You are welcome to do what you want with your money, you don’t have to be here, no one does. But for the record, I don’t just look nice, I AM nice. And FYI, bullying me and threatening me is NOT nice.”
I never curse in front of my child or at my child, or at any one human, animal, or plant. I never use my words to hurt someone. Now my words may be hurtful to some when I use them to tell the truth. I am known for telling it straight. So I will tell you exactly how I feel about you, even if it may hurt a bit to hear the truth.
Some people have said that I come off crude, ungraceful, or uneducated by using cuss words.
Calah, from the blog Patheos, has a great article about why she, as a devout Catholic and highly educated woman and mom, loves to cuss. She could not have explained her – or my own – feelings any better:
I really do love certain cuss words. “Hell” is a particular favorite of mine. So is “shit”. And nothing has quite the same pizazz as a well-placed “asshat.” And yet, you don’t see blog posts from me chock full of profanity. This post has more profanity in it than I usually use in a month. When I use those words, it’s because of the connotation they have. It’s because there’s a certain je ne sais quoi about them in whatever sentence I happen to be constructing that cannot be duplicated by using another word. I know this, because I always reach for the less offensive word first, particularly because I know some people are very sensitive to cussing. (Sorry, Mom.) I strongly disagree with those who say that using those words means I can’t think of another way to express myself. I can think of other ways, but no other way would express it just right. A less colorful, less accurate word chosen solely on the chance that the word I mean might offend someone doesn’t cut it for me. In fact, I love language enough to say what I really mean and not dance around it with lackluster substitutes.
But I don’t want to be the kind of person who just says, “No, you are wrong and I am right, and I will keep on cursing and that is the end of that”. So I have contemplated this subject for almost a year. I asked advice from friends, collegues, and Catholic mamas who I respect, trying to decide if I would stop cursing on M+BL and even go back to edit all of my past posts that have curse words in them.
In case anyone is curious, I probably drop one curse word a week, if that. Now if you were talking to me in person, and you are a close friend, it might be 2 curse words per sentence depending on what we’re talking about. I have always loved telling stories, and I love to get animated, use colorful language to entertain, and make someone laugh or engage them in my story. It shouldn’t be a secret; curse words sometimes help do that.
Here is what I have come up with as a compromise, because while I don’t believe I am sinning, I do not want to hurt or offend anyone and I do take your concerns to heart:
- I will not drop an F-bomb in this space ever again. The only time I have ever used the F-word in a post was in my miscarriage post and that will stay. There is absolutely no other word that can describe what I was feeling when I was in my bathroom, as the miscarriage began, tears streaming down my face, anger boiling up within and me thinking (to myself) that it is F****** BULLSHIT that I am about to give birth to a dead baby. But other than that post, you will not see that word here ever.
- I won’t use the words asshole or bitch either. Even though they can be SO funny sometimes.
- These are the curse words I will use on very rare occasions when truly no other word will convey what I want: shit, crap, hell, and damn.
I will do my best to substitute those words with things like you-know-what, hoot, dern, darn, heck, etc. But if those words do not convey and tell the story with the kind of emphasis that it needs I will use a curse word.
You can rest assured that I will never curse at child, animal, or person. I am not saying I am perfect and that I have never said something mean to a person or about a person. I have called my husband an a-hole on several occasions in our almost decade of being together, and I have called some women the b word, not to their face, but when confiding in my husband or a close friend about that person’s behavior, but I go to confession like a good Catholic and I know that is wrong. I am sorry for it and have done things to right that sin.
Also FYI, I do not curse in front of a child or take the Lord’s name in vain. Again, I am not perfect and there have been slip ups, but on a whole, it’s of my moral constitution to not curse in front of child or take the Lord’s name in vain. When Penelope starts developing her own story telling and communication style, I plan on being very honest and direct with her. I will let her know cursing is not a sin, but that she will need to be respectful of her surroundings and of course I will teach her that it is a sin to curse AT someone. I might feel very differently about all of this the day Penelope starts dropping an f-bomb when she stubs her toe at the house, but for now this is the plan.
Part of my decision to continue to curse is that this website is not a pretty, cleaned up version of me. It’s just me. I have always been blessed with the ability to be real and tell the truth. I don’t know how to function any other way. When communicating I don’t know how to lie, or filter, or tone things down, or beat around the bush. I don’t have time for that shit! I have things to do! A family to tend to, dreams to fullfill. If you come across me, you are gonna get me.
So for now the cursing stays but I will keep it to the absolute bare minimum, but I am gonna keep being me.
And like Ellen says, my haters are my motivators. Like Ellen, even though I am not perfect and I don’t fit in a pretty little box that sometimes people want me to stay in, I am all about love and kindness to all humans, telling the truth and keeping it real.
I hope this post and my compromises makes you feel better if you don’t like it when I curse, and I hope that you will stick around regardless of a few damns, hells and shits around here, because there is so much good stuff here! If not, I understand, and this is not the community for you and I wish you well.
I personally do not curse, it has just never been a part of my vocabulary BUT I have no right to judge others for doing so. The reason I read your blog is because you write so honestly…good for you!
Thank you so much! So glad to hear that.
I heart curse words
lol, yeah, me too. They had my heart a long time ago!
I personally LOVE reading your blog and part if it is how funny and honest you are INCLUDING the curse words. People need to lighten up a bit…they are words used in a funny way. Keep doing what you are doing! Love you and your blog!
Thanks Stephanie!
I hate that some members of my church are so closed-minded and rude. I am LDS and heaven knows I am not curse-free. My husband and I both let a few minor curse words slip on occasion. Like you, we don’t do it in front of our child. I find it completely ridiculous to judge others on anything, let alone something as trivial as a word. I love your blog and would read it even if you dropped the “f-bomb” in every post! Keep up the good work!
Another LDS (Mormon) reader here–just wanted to chime in and support the fact that the person who “reported you” to the LDS Church (assuming that means The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) doesn’t represent all of us. And believe me, at the crossroads of motherhood, health, kids, food, and slow cookers are a lot of Mormon women reading this blog! (And also, there’s no basis or process of “reporting” in this church–and the magazine which they might have referred to isn’t an official magazine of the Church, either.)
I believe in honest writing, though I appreciate clean writing. I’m not offended by your curse words, but I think your efforts not to use the worst of them is great! To me, it’s more important not to take the Lord’s name in vain than to drop a few choice four-letter words. And you’re probably well aware that your blog is faaaaaaaaar from the dirty ones I’ve come across. I find it pretty uplifting, actually.
Thanks for being so respectful, and I hope your readers return you the favor. As another commenter pointed out, you’re providing this content for free. There are no gateways to reading; therefore, the exit is also wide open if someone feels uncomfortable here.
i concur! as another LDS reader i cringed when i read it was someone from the LDS church who “reported” you. what is that? i love your blog and if something offends me (which it never has) then i won’t read it. it’s not like people are being forced to read it! and guuuuuurl, sometimes you just gotta let one fly! keep being yourself! we like ya that way!
Thanks ladies. I certainly don’t think that the actions of person in the LDS church represent the whole religion, because, ahem, what would that say about mine?! lol. Anyway, thanks so much for your support.
I heart curse words, too, and thing it’s hysterical in the way you cuss. Curse words enhance stories, IMO, and I’m sorry you’ve been given crap about it.
Thanks Maureen.
Ditto to what Sarah says. Cursing is the best. Not in front of children though.
word.
WOW. People REALLY need to lighten up. And perhaps leave all the judgments to the man upstairs. Sheesh. I love this blog because you’re writing is awesome – shits and all. The other thing is, if a person doesn’t like it, then they need to stay away. Example: strip clubs are not my cup of tea so I don’t go. Duh. Seriously.
I am so sorry that people have made you feel like you cannot be yourself on your own blog. I would say to hell with them and be true to yourself. We have become such a “PC” world in which at every turn someone imposes their own beliefs on you. If what I say or do offends someone then it is best that we do not run in the same circles. There is no way to make everyone happy! What if people told them they wouldn’t read their blogs because they were offended about them talking about their religion, would they stop! I seriously doubt it so why should you stop saying what YOU want to say. I support you know matter what!
Totally!
The curse words are what make you YOU! They, among other things, are what initially drew me to your blog. You were honest, funny, intelligent, and had everything out there. Delicate eyes can look away and elsewhere. That’s why this world is so gol durned fabulous! <—see that? No curse words!
Thanks so much for letting me know! I am so glad I wrote this post, it was really stressing me out thinking that everyone did not like it when I cursed!
The curse words don’t bother me at all!
Well, sister, you are in the right place then!
You can’t please everybody so you might as well be yourself! If people take issue, it is their problem to deal with. Of course I agree that we should strive to always be kind and respectful of others’ feelings, but as you said, there is no obligation for anyone to be here. You put your content out for FREE and it is up to us if we want to read it and/or support you by buying your products. I certainly do enjoy it and love your cookbook! Thanks for all you do!
That is for damn! I had to learn that lesson the hard way a couple of years ago. It really bothers me when people don’t like me, because I think they just misunderstand me, but at the end of the day, some people will just not like you and that is OK!
You shouldn’t have to change yourself to please anyone. I love that you are YOU and that’s what keeps me coming back to your blog. If someone doesn’t like it they have the freedom to not read your blog. Plain and simple. You may choose to not use the f-word on your blog anymore but the comment section is kind of a free for all (granted you can delete comments but whatever) so I just wanted to say:
You fucking rock.
YOU fucking rock!!
So, I found your blog today, via just eat real food (who are promoting your cookbook this evening) and after reading this post am so sorry to see that Kate beat me to the punch
but she IS right, and thanks for sharing it all, tidy or not!!
I think the only sentence needed for this whole post was the last half of your last sentence, “and this is not the community for you and I wish you well.”
lol, well that certainly would have been easier!
I do not use cuss words because of my personal convictions, however, this is your blog to use as you wish. If people are offended by things you write then they shouldn’t read it….just saying:)
Exactly!
What the hell??!!! What’s this crap I’m hearing about no more curse words on this blog? Lol. Seriously though, your occasional curse words do not offend me in the least. I find it humorous at times and much needed at others. So now you’re gonna stop? Damn!!
I actually do not cuss on my blog. The reason is that I write the way I speak, and there are only a few bad words that I ever speak and those are crap and damn. I guess those are curse words, but not as “bad” as some others? I guess. So on my blog I use those words from time to time. But that’s just me, that’s my blog and that’s me. I honestly would never visit another persons blog and suggest they change their style or the words they use. I’m surprised you’ve gotten such bold comments from others.
I know, I don’t get it. If you say “shoot”, you’re technically cursing, right? “You bugger!” is the same exact thing as “You bitch!” you’re just using a different word, it’s still cursing at a person. Freak, frack, fudge, frig all mean fuck even if they’re not the same exact word. You could curse in German and most Americans aren’t going to know you cursed, but they’re still curses and still bad. It’s all about intention.
holy crap! when i first met the person who is my now bestie, we were out shopping and she started cursing in german! i about died laughing because i knew what she was saying. she said that in all her 30 years of living in this area i was the first one who understood what she said! it is all about intention!
Oh girl, I am not gonna stop, just maybe gonna tone it down a wee bit, but def gonna keep on being me!
Holy Hell! I can’t believe people give you a hard time for cursing on your own blog.
Right?! Some of them really were nice about it, and were very kind in their delivery, I guess in a concerned for my soul kind of way, but some were just mean.
Stephanie:
Anyone who thinks you aren’t nice has never met you! You radiate warmth, caring and generosity. Your blog is a reflection of YOU which is why you have a lot of readers and followers. You read as REAL! I have a Christian-themed blog on Fruit of the Spirit. I’m not cursing on my blog because I don’t think it fits with what I’m writing about. But if I were blogging about my day-to-day life that might be a different story. The judgmental people should stuff a sock in it!
You tell ‘em, Julie!
Your cussing (along with going into details about things SO many other people wouldn’t dare to reveal) is you being you — honest, straight forward and like you said, you’re HELPING, you’re NOT hurting. I understand why you’re compromising, but it frankly sucks that you feel you have too for those who are verbally judging you for YOUR life choices (this is YOUR blog after all, they didn’t have to continue reading after the first cuss word if it makes that big of a difference in their minds).
Your blog is amazing and the rawness of it and how much your personality comes through makes it more unique than any other blog I follow. Many bloggers do push themselves into “that pretty little box” you mentioned, but that’s NOT REAL. Keep being you and true followers will continue to follow because we want the REAL Stephanie, not some censored Stephanie that if I met you in real life would think, “You are not at all who I thought you’d be” after a 30 minute conversation. So many bloggers almost seem like robots and honestly, even with videos and such, I don’t know them or connect with them on a level that I connect with you in being so honest and straightforward about everything from cussing, to bumps in your marriage (that EVERYONE has), labor/delivery and ALL that goes into it (what even your BFF”s won’t tell you).
Keep on keeping on Stephanie!
ALL MY BEST!
Shit! Hell, damn, and crap are curse words too? Well then I’m f*cked
I could never write a blog, clearly, but I love reading yours. Keep up the great work!
Thanks for reading and commenting Jackie, so glad to have you here!
Well, I didn’t know there were still people in this world that think ‘hell’ is a cuss word till I used it in a post. I love language too and can tell you that’s how many a Texas grandma would have delivered it! Got a few complaints about it. My mamma is a southern lady who near fainted dead away if a cuss word crossed my lips … so I learned well not to cuss as a kid. Feels kind of unnatural when I do it, but I don’t mind at all if you want to Stephanie
or anyone else for that matter.
Aw, your from Texas you probably get to say one of my favorite things a lot, “horse shit!”
I’ve heard that one many times straight from many a Texas granny’s mouth
I have to agree there are times that no other words will do justice and some days are crap and if we don’t blog about them people may just start to think we live in a la di da magazine pictured house, not the real world, and what fun would that be!? I am a Christian and I swear and cuss and I don’t think I should pretend to be someone I’m not in my blog, my life or even in church. I am me, all the time and everywhere and I use cuss words probably more than I should, but I do and that’s just how it is. Even my mother drops a few, I was utterly shocked by it each time because it as so very rare that it really held the full ‘slap in the face’ full on meaning to it. If she were to kick her toe or drop a glass and have it smash she would exclaim “shit!” And my dearest BFF, has only heard her once and she dropped her jaw and clasped her hand over her mouth in utter shock! Ha. Good on you for being you everywhere and ll the time.
Yup, there truly are no other words that can compare sometimes.
I too adore cursing…and thought I was good about NOT doing it in front of my little one until he said “sucks”the other day. Now that’s really a curse (but I say it about EVERYTHING that’s the slightest bit disappointing!) so we have changed that to “shucks”. My dirty mouth is here to stay-I will just try REALLY REALLY hard to not use it around my bun bun…which sometimes shucks…
lol. it does shuck!
one time my husband came home from work and was complaining about a co-worker and called him a deusch bag. And then Penelope toddled around the house saying deusch bag for a couple of hours and it took all our will not to laugh hyseterically and let her keep saying it.
Wow, this is your blog, it’s your space, you can do what you want with it! I totally agree with your philosophy too – sometimes a curse word just makes a story more animated/dramatic/exciting. I also agree with you in not swearing in front of children. There is a time and a place for curse words. When we first adopted our son (when he was 8 months) we had to quickly clean up the language in our home. We immediately began substituting Dora and Diego for B*tch and B*st*rd – just for laughs! It was our inside joke for storytelling for awhile
that is too funny!
You’re too kind. If it were my blog, I’d start dropping the f bomb in every post after getting the complaints! Like someone else said, I don’t like strip clubs, so I don’t go. I don’t like watching horror films, I don’t watch them. Don’t like reading “real” thoughts, don’t f*cking read them!
Lol, one of my friends said the same thing.
Here’s the deal…(and I speak from personal experience)…when people feign outrage over your language, it’s not about you. It’s about them. I used to be one of “them”. I was never really “offended” by someone else cursing. I was arrogant and self-righteous and in my mind was OBVIOUSLY a much better person than they were for taking the moral high-ground and using only language that my God would approve of, therefor they needed to defer to MY morality. What they are doing, basically, is wagging their finger at you and sneering, “How DARE you curse in my presence! Can’t you tell I’m a much better person than you are!!?”
Today, I look back at my self-righteous self and think, “What an assclown!” I was being arrogant and asinine and embarrassing myself and was so wrapped up in my purple robe and crown that I didn’t even know it. I’m so much happier to have shed that self-righteous and embarrassing cloak.
I say to hell with ‘em. You should not have to adhere to an LDS-Approved Blogosphere Lexicon for your posts. By bowing to them you are only feeding their ego. Your blog is like your home. If people don’t like what you have to say in your home, they can leave. I would NEVER presume to tell someone what language they should use in their own space. If I didn’t like it, I would just leave without feeling the need to wag my ass at them on the way out the door. But that’s just me, damn it.
That is such a great point! Thanks for sharing and being so open and honest. Love it.
I f*cking love curse words! They’re real. Keep up the good work.
They are!
Hi Stephanie
I am practicing catholic, momma to 3 kids (2of them teenagers), garden growing momma who cusses on a regular basis. I do try to watch it and when I drop something or forget to do something, my kids will hear me say dammit or shit or something to that nature. Like you, I don’t cus at people, but I cus nonetheless. While I hold it in around lets say a grandparenty person, other than that, I say what I say. If I acted different around everybody who didn’t like “approve” whatever about me, I would have a personality disorder. I am who I am, people can take it or leave it.
Yes! I honestly think a TON of peole do have personality disorders, too afraid to just be themselves and say what they really think. Thanks so much for commenting.
since when is crap a curse word? my kids use it all the time…
Yeah, I didn’t think it was either till my Is Chick Fila Crap Food post. Some of the emails I got about stopping cursing were specificlaly about that post! I guess to some people it is!
So crap is a curse word too? What’s this world coming to!
Hello,I just read some of your blog,I didn’t know about it until someone posted on my FB page.There are people who don’t like anything,everything,nothing,anyone or anybody.It is ok for them to shoot off at the mouth about how you write,but I would bet if someone bitched about theirs, HELL would erupt and spew all over Earth.I will tell you I have read the Bible and GOD did quite a bit of Damning,telling people about Hell,ASS can be taken 2 ways,A female dog is a Bitch,Webster Dictionary says F. Dog and Bitchy woman —so to speak.I personally don’t care if someone curses,so what big deal,grow up and get a life or something.Really if your don’t like what she is saying then go read something else.The Internet is Just like TV if I don’t like what is on the Tube then I either change the Channel or turn the damn thing off.What exactly is so hard about that?. I happen to find her writing refreshing,kind of reminds me of me speaks their mind and don’t care.I figure if people don’t like it then it’s their personal problem,I don’t do personal problems.They will get over it,if they don’t then they won’t—too bad.Oh yes by the way—you people have the right of freedom of speech and expression—well so does she.You also have the right to remain silent,this is her blog so maybe remain silent and go somewhere else,No One has a gun to your head making you read her Blog.
Totally, just a little click and you can be gone, no need to send me an email asking me to stop!
I just signed up for your newsletter. It’s great reading your blog, I swear like a sailor, so my husband says. I understand!
Nice! Welcome!
i heart cursewords. a lot. i have a mouth like a sailor. also, i want to be you when i grow up.
Well, the mouth like a sailor thing is half the battle!!
Wow. I give you props for even writing this long, thoughtful, and elegant post. You should not have to defend yourself on your own blog. To quote Dirty Dancing, if you love me you have to love all of me. I completely understand what you mean about story telling and cursing. Sometimes there are just no other words to adequately express yourself or the story you’re telling at the time. Personally, I feel like this is YOUR blog and it conveys YOU and how YOU live life…the key word being YOU. If you want to cuss on your blog then go for it. If people don’t like it or respect it then that is their problem. You should not have to change who you are in your own blog to please people. If people don’t like it, then let them go find another blog that doesn’t “upset” them with cursing. Be you sweet, kind, caring, and amazing self–no matter what people think. I laugh the hardest when reading your blog when you are cursing while telling a funny story. I have actually thought before “I wish she did that more!”. See yourself and keep kicking major ass.
I love that I made you laugh! Makes me happy. Thanks for reading Kaylee.
You’re welcome. I can’t wait to be able to implement more of your advice when I have kids of my own!
I do not judge you or think that using curse words in your posts are offensive. Like you said, they color the story and personally I think that it makes it feel like we are chatting in the same room. that is what I love about your blog. I personally also curse on my blog but also only when it just feels right for the story. You can’t please everyone. It was very nice that you even posted with an explanation, because really you don’t owe that to anyone. This is YOUR blog and you can do whatever the HELL you want =) Keep up the great job!
Thanks so much Barb.
I LOVE LOVE LOVE that you cuss, make fun of yourself and show the world what a fun genuine person you are. When i first came across your blog My eyes widened and I laughed out loud – I had never come across a cussing blogger! I immediaetly signed up and have been loving your posts ever since. I also cannot believe you have self righteous haters, personally I find a lot of bloggers too clean and boring. Keep on cussing Stephanie!
That is so funny! Yup, that’s me the cussing blogger! So glad you are here.
Wow, it kills me that you have to even defend the fact you cuss! What self righteous a**holes come onto your blog and say, please stop acting like yourself! I’ve always thought of a blog as like an online personal journal that you’re willing to share with the world. That in of itself is amazing because it takes so much guts to share that with people. It bothers me that people try to tell you what to do on you’re own personal website. Anyways, I’ve always loved that you cussed! It’s like talking to one of my best friends! It totally makes you real! Keep up the cuss words!! Hell yeah!
Sooo glad to hear that Angela!
I don’t normally comment but this really irked me. I love your blog and your sassiness, including the curse words, and without it just wouldn’t be you. That’s the point of a blog, to share yourself and your stories. if you have to change that to please some people, then you are writing fiction – and if that’s what people are looking for, maybe their time would be better spent at the library. Keep being true to yourself and we’ll keep coming back!
Thanks so much for commenting Laurie! And thanks for the encouragment, it means a lot to me.
I’m a new reader to your blog but I have thoroughly enjoyed the posts I have read, curse words and all. I am not offended in the least. In fact, I think you’re pretty damn cool. Your in Florida right? Well, I’m in Texas and Florida is just as southern a state as mine, so next time someone gives you grief just whip out a little southern charm on them- smile real big and say “well bless your heart.” Not a single cuss word there, but it means every single one of them.
Good idea!
Stephanie, I don’t know if you’ve seen the video of the homeless hitchhiker, but when I saw it I thought of this post! You have no potty mouth at all compared to this guy! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ckfBGdZoR_0
I just started reading your blog and have been totally entertained by your posts, lots of great information and recipies. I agree, people first need to lighten up. It seems pretty simple, if you dont like something that is being written, if it offends you, dont listen to it, dont read it, turn it off, close the computer and walk away. Why feel the need to put someone down or demand that they follow your value system? This is your blog and your postings, it should reflect who you are as a person. Secondly, as a reader, it does make you seem more “normal”. Its very easy in this age of pintrest, blogs and even facebook, for everyone to make their life sound wonderful, problem-free and Martha Stewart-like. I enjoy your posts because, cussing or not, you sound like someone I can relate to, and I like that. Not interested in perfection, but relateable.
I do find it ridiculous when people who claim to be Christians feel the need to batter, threaten and bully people in the name of their “superior” beliefs. I will never cease to be amazed that those individuals never catch onto the irony of acting in an un-Christian like manner, to get someone else to believe in their Christian views and stop what they believe is un-Christian behavior. So, good for you for standing up to the bully and pointing out that bit of inconsistancy.
Hang in there, continue with your amazing posts….its always easy to assume that those few who complain speak for the majority because they are louder and generally ruder. But that is not the case.
Thanks so much Angie!
I love to curse. You have my blessing.
Lol, why thank you!
Ohhh Mmmmm Geeee!!! Thank you for being REAL!!!
Thanks for reading!!
I’m a nana from the south who does cuss from time to time, but I have learned from my own experience that cussing really doesn’t serve me well. There’s always another way of being funny or making a point. I have learned that if my cussing turns off even one person then I’m not doing myself any favors by engaging in that form of communication. After all, cussing is really not necessary. I’m sixty-five years old and still trying to improve myself so shoot I’ll try to stop cussing if y’all will!
I disagree. In fact, this is the whole point of my post. You may want to re-read the post if that point wasn’t clear to you. The reason I cuss is because there is no other way of being funny or making a point the same way with out cussing. For me. You might have a funnier way, but nothing tells a story quite like a little cussing for me. And this is my blog. If cussing doesnt serve you well, then by all means, don’t cuss. But you don’t get to come here and say that there is absolutely another way of being funny or making a point.
Well shit, I came here to get your e-book and I am enjoying the hell out of your sight!
awesome!! welcome to M+BL!
oh man I LOVE you! I haven’t read thru all your comments, because usually people only respond with nasty comments to a post like this (a little two faced if you ask me), but I LOVE swearing too! It makes me happy, helps me express myself, and within reason (like you’ve mentioned above) it’s okay every once in awhile! I should also say, I’m LDS, and I apologize for all the close minded LDS people who think life is black and white, which is not my experience at all, life is full of a million different shades of grey. They need to worry about their own sins instead of shaming people into believing their point of view. We all makes choices based on our life experiences and point of view, and we need to love each other and judge less. Keep being who you are! I love it!
Thanks so much Amy! I have actually recieved almost all positive support! I was pretty amazed and relieved!
Just wandered across you looking for some breastfeeding support, I have a 2 yearold not the least bit interested in weaning, but that is another topic for another day. Thanks for making me laugh, or should I say lmao!
Thanks for reading! If it makes you feel any better I have a three year old with no interest in weaning either.
Just stumbled upon your blog. I am amazed that this is even an issue. If people don’t like what they read, why don’t they just leave and read something else. I doubt someone forced them to stick around, judge someone else, post a comment while hiding behind a computer screen, since they are so perfect in every way, I’m sure. Anyway, I’m finding some useful articles on your site. My Grandma is 96 and still watches Jerry Springer, and she’s not a bad person. So I’m assuming just because you cuss, doesn’t make you a bad person either. lol
That is so funny about your Grandma!!
Hello, newbie here…
Just curious, because I am not Catholic, how is it considered a sin to cuss AT someone but not a sin to use curse words in other speech? That seems confusing to me. In my christian beliefs, sin is sin. Not judging you or anything like that- it’s just that I have never heard that before and I was raised around quite a few catholic communities in CA and TX.- varying in degree of catholocism.. My hubby, who is a minister, would be quite curious as well if you don’t mind sharing. Just want to learn something new! Thanks
Because when you say shit! about stubbing your toe, you are not hurting anyone. But if you call someone a bitch (cursing at someone) you are hurting them. Being hurtful is what is sinful. God doesn’t care if you say shit because you stubbed your toe, only if you call someone else a shit head. Make sense?
Stephanie, never let anyone steal your sunshine! I LOVE reading your blog! I have laughed and cried along with you and your readers. Please don’t change. One of the reason’s (and there are many) I come to visit you here is the way you write your stories of life, love and sadly loss. I am but one person, but i am not offended by the occasional cuss word that finds it’s way into a story. I will continue to visit M+BL. Thanks for listening.
Thanks for reading Doreen!
I spent four years in the Navy and have heard almost everything anyone can dish out. I must say that I have very little to no tolerance at all for the f-bomb (or any of its more “polite” variants). It (and all the vulgarities that refer to anatomy) remind me of my father, who was a porn addicted misogynist. I thought of him when you spoke of the wrong in using words to curse at someone or in a hurtful way. The only attitude he managed to inculcate in me was a severe dislike of such hateful speech.
I don’t cuss. You never know what baggage someone carries when you meet them. The Apostle Paul tells of how he avoided certain behaviors, not because they were wrong for him, but rather because of the scandal they might give to others. Some people will turn you off before you ever get a chance to share your story or listen to theirs.
God bless and keep you and yours, Stephanie.
G.
I came across your blog today from a Freezer Cooking pin. It went to today’s home page where the article was on energy healing. I confess – I rolled my eyes. I scrolled down looking for freezer cooking stuff and there under the Editor’s Pick was this article. Potty Mouth? Okay now you’ve got my attention….
Your comments “I have always been blessed with the ability to be real and tell the truth. I don’t know how to function any other way. When communicating I don’t know how to lie, or filter, or tone things down, or beat around the bush.” have really got me thinking. I have the same “challenges” but have never really thought of it as… well… a blessing or a gift before. I usually apologize and sometimes blame it on my ADD. And when people say “that’s okay we know that’s just how you are”, I don’t tend to take that as a compliment. But now… now I think I’m just going to smile and say Thank You. Because I am pretty awesome. (Okay maybe that part I’ll just say in my inside (my head) voice)
You ARE awesome! So glad to hear you are claiming your power back! Lots of love to you and thanks for stopping by and reading, despite the eye rolling.
I just read this.. I read something the other day that said “people who swear (or say “f”) a lot are the most honest people out there” I am a christian, and I swear! I can not stand people swearing in general conversation or around children etc.. but like you I would never swear at someone, but when I am cooking and drop something on the floor or burn something.. believe me the f-bomb will be used and frankly it just shows a bit of passion!
Something I find really funny, I was working with a jewish guy who used to scorn me for eating pork every so often but had no problem saying “Jesus” or “Jesus Christ” “God” as profanity around me, so one day I said.. “if you would like me to stop eating bacon around you, maybe you could stop using “Jesus” or “Jesus Christ” “God” as profanity around me” He didn’t know what to say, because he had been so concerned about his own beliefs he had forgotten that other people had different beliefs!
Good on you for posting this! I love your blog!
What a great story, thanks for sharing!