By the end of the week, I was at the end of my rope, and several times I had to do some serious deep breathing to keep from screaming at her. The urge to scream was so strong! On top of that, Peter and I are still at each other’s throats these days. So instead of having a doting partner, once she is asleep, to help restore me after a long day, I have another battle to fight.
So Monday night, I dove into a bottle of red wine and a box of cookies. That got me through the evening and Tuesday I was adamant about starting fresh and remembering and implementing healthier ways to reduce my frustration.I remembered something my energy healer/therapist told me about before I even met Peter. She told me to rip up newspapers or paper grocery bags as a way to process and release anger and frustration.
What triggered the memory is that I had just gone to the grocery store and forgot my cloth bags so I had 10 brown paper grocery bags in the kitchen.
So I took them all down and put them on the floor of the kitchen. I told Penelope we were going to play a game and that it was going to help Mama with her anger. I told her that I have lots of frustration pent up and that I needed to get it out!!
Then I started ripping the bags as loudly and dramatically I as I could!!
I was even grunting and was sighing heavily, to entertain Penelope and in an effort to get more of the pent up negative energy out. Penelope helped and joined in too. Mostly, she watched me very intently.
When I ripped every last bag, I rubbed my hands together and then shook them over the pile. I told her that we are going to shake, shake shake our anger out! There is a song she loves, called Shake, Shake Shake your sillies out, so she thought this part was awesome.
Then we did a couple of deep breaths and Om’s and cleaned up our mess. It made me feel better and I was happy to have used this opportunity to teach Penelope how to deal with her emotions. I want her to know that its ok to be mad, but that it needs a constructive outlet so it doesn’t get taken out on somebody else.
I still needed to do some yoga, and I was thankfully able to go to a yoga class that night.
It reminded me of my two favorite yoga poses for when I am about to lose it and need to calm down.
Child’s Pose and Reclined Bound Angle Pose. Both are what I consider “close circuit” poses. What I mean by close circuit is that your body becomes a sort of circle or loop, and the energy meridians have an opportunity to reboot, rebalance and realign your parasympathetic nervous system.
Child’s pose is so easy, but it can be difficult for some people if they have tight hips. In that case, you can spread your knees far apart or lift your pelvis up and put a blanket under your bottom. You can also stack up blankets and put them underneath your chest and lean over them if you can’t actually get your head to the floor.
You can have your arms outstretched in front for an additional shoulder stretch or down by your sides. I think arms down by your sides is more restorative and more “closed circuit.”
For Reclined Bound Angle Pose lie on your back and bring the soles of the feet together. Your feet can be as close or as far away from your body as you want them. You can place blankets under your back and under each knee for an even more restorative version. Then place your hands over your stomach and clasp them together somehow that is comfortable for you.
Don’t you love how I am doing yoga in the middle of a mess of toys. You know its Mama Yoga when.